This is a list of some important lessons I have learned over the years…..

Do not attend every argument I am invited to. I used to love confrontation and arguing. I wanted to be right…every single time….and I wanted to prove to everyone else that I was right. When the Lord started convicting me over this behavior it was a hard one to let go of, especially after starting in ministry. Starting Fullness of Joy Ministry caused some push back because I teach a lot about spiritual warfare, crucifying our flesh, and many other topics a lot of folks don’t want to hear about. In the beginning I would often get called names, told I was a false teacher, and attacked over and over. I would often type out huge responses only to have the Lord tell me no-delete it. Most of the time I did, but honestly there were times I hit the button and commented anyway. It was a battle that took me a while to overcome in my flesh. My flesh wanted to respond, but the Lord taught me not to attend every argument I am invited to. He taught me to be quick to forgive, release, and move on. We really do choose every single interaction we have with others and many times it means we should practice refraining from responding at all.

Each person is on their own journey and we are not all at the same place. Let God do the work, it is not my job to fix anyone. When I was first set free, through deliverance, I wanted that same freedom for everyone. Everything the Lord taught me about deliverance, identity in Him, surrender, etc. was so life changing that I wanted everyone to experience what He was doing in my life in their own life. I would feel it so deeply when people did not walk in total freedom or when they would fall back into old patterns. Many times it felt like I wanted them to have freedom more than they wanted it. It took the Lord showing me that it was my job to teach, pray, and then release them to Him. It is their journey with Him and not mine. Some plant, some water, and some reap. It is not my job to question or my job to try to do it all. It is my job to follow His leading and nothing more.

There is such a thing as Godly boundaries. Even Jesus took time to be alone and pray. When I first started Fullness of Joy Ministry I started by posting content, doing deliverance ministry, and praying with people. When I started sharing I made myself available to everyone literally 24/7. People would call me in the middle of the night and I would sit with them for hours, they would call while I was on trips to visit family and I would talk for hours, they would call while I was with my kids, husband and other family members and I would talk with them for hours. I scheduled back to back prayer meetings all week long. I had zero boundaries because somewhere along the way I got the idea that they needed what I had. I never had the idea that they needed me, but that they HAD to have what I had been given by God (His freedom, teaching, prayer, etc.) The Lord let me go on like that for a while and I got to the place I was totally burned out. I went to Him complaining about the ministry and how tired I was. It was then that He started teaching me about boundaries, alone time, family time, and time with Him. My only job is to point folks to Him and to say yes to whatever He calls me to do. I remember one time going to Him and saying how full my plate was and He asked me who told me to put all those things on my plate. That stopped me in my tracks. He went on to say that everything is a calling, but not everything is MY calling. He taught me the importance of seeking Him before I commit to anything. He also taught me that there is a huge difference in doing for Him and being with Him. We can spend hours and hours doing for Him, but if we neglect our time WITH Him we are neglecting our relationship with Him. Nothing else in our lives, even doing for Him, can take the place of being with Him. He has to be number one because He will never accept second place in our lives.

My emotions often lie to me. I used to be driven by my emotions. I was up, down, and all over the place in a matter of seconds. I allowed my emotions to be my truth and that was a miserable way to live. The Lord taught me to make His Word the foundation of my life and to view life through the lens of His Word. He also taught me to allow the discernment of the Holy Spirit and His truth, found in the Bible, to guide my actions, thoughts, and choices.

Shutting down is not an option. For my entire life my go to coping skill was to shut down, but it is not an option anymore. I used to avoid and shut out all emotions except anger. That was a safe emotion for me and one I was very familiar with. If I got hurt I did not allow myself to feel the hurt. Instead I would feel rage and I was very comfortable with rage. Whatever happened in life I would not allow myself to feel it. I would shut it out, shut it down, and suppress it. A few years ago the Lord started dealing with me about shutting down. When He first started speaking to me about it I was afraid because I was not sure I could or even wanted to start experiencing emotions. I was afraid it would be to overwhelming and that maybe I could not handle it. The Lord has been so kind and gentle to help me to trust Him even with my emotions. It is a process I am still walking through because for my entire life I have automatically shut down. It takes effort to stay present and sit with my emotions, but God offers His strength and healing every single time. I still have to make the conscience choice to refuse to shut down, but with time I know it will become my norm. Change takes effort, but God makes it possible!

I choose my attitude, responses, and what thoughts I allow to remain in my mind. I am responsible for them and the consequences that come with my choices. I am not responsible for others and others cannot make me make the wrong choices. No one can make me sin or have the wrong response or attitude. I have learned to have accountability in my life. I used to feel like it was someone else or my situation that caused me to react in the ways I did, but that was a lie. I am responsible for every single thing I do and say and it really is a choice no matter what is going on in my life.

I have learned many many more lessons, but these are a few that I was thinking about recently. I hope you all find them helpful as well!

Blessings,

Nichole Henson

Fullness of Joy Ministry

Fullnessofjoyministry@gmail.com